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Wednesday, September 10, 2008

The days of new motherhood


We survived Jessica's hospital stay and now she is peacefully at home. Well, other than being wakened up every 3 hours or so. Mr. Dad and I were civil to each other her last night at the hospital but, as I feared, when you give him a little nibble of niceness, he jumps out and devours you.

Our agreement with Jess was that they meet at a public place if she were to decide to let him spend time with the baby. If I were to let him come over once (which would be against my husband's wishes and he is not worth causing marital problems) he would be at our door every day like a stray animal looking for food. I can not and will not live my life like that. Just because he's the dad doesn't mean I have to see him. So, of course he asks me (over her head) if he can come over to visit him.

"No, you get to meet somewhere as planned," I answer.
Silence from him.

So, how does he get me back? HE is carrying the baby out to the car.
Big deal.

Also, as I expected, he called my daughter about 20 times since she's been home. You know, to make sure every thing's ok. THAT put a damper on her getting things done.

"You need to tell him how things are going to be," I tell her.

"I know," she answers.

"Hmmm," I finish.

Let her discover her new baby right now, I say to myself. Now, she can finally play with him, kiss him and love him without Mr. Dad telling her how to do it. She'll learn what's important and she will get tired of having a control freak around telling her what to do all the time. I trust her- it would just be easier to kick his ass, but as she will learn, moms have to let their children figure it out for themselves.

12 comments:

snark snark said...

What a precious new baby boy!

eighthelpinghands said...

Hey you! I just talked to Roberta Willows! She couldn't believe it when I told her you became a grandmother! She says hi and congrats, and I'm calling Wendi Peters tonight. We will definitely have to have a "reunion" soon! Your grandbaby is SOOOO cute! I'm jealous!

P.S. I changed my blog it is now http://eighthelpinghands.blog.com

Love, Michelle

Dana said...

the baby is so cute.. and god for you sticking to your guns... i wouldn't want a stray "dog" on my doorstep either...

Cant Hardly Wait said...

Beautiful little baby boy. I hope all goes well with Mr. Dad. Here's to him not giving you too much trouble.

Tena said...

your daughter looks so happy holding her new baby boy!
If I were you, I think I would do the same thing about the father of the baby!

ParentingPink said...

Congrats on your new "blue" arrival!

Shannon@Vogue Mum said...

Take if from a mama who was in a BAD relationship and had a baby from it, she will get it. Chandlur has had the best daddy ever since he was about 3 months old and doesn't know his sperm donor. It will work itself out.

shannon
Rock Star Maternity
The Domestic Engineer's Union

Helene said...

Awww, what a precious picture of your daughter with her new baby!!! Congratulations again!

Elizabeth Channel said...

Your daughter looks so beautiful! Certainly not like she just had a baby.

mrsbear said...

That's a great photo of the two of them. I wish you guys the best of luck sorting things out. Sounds like a tough time, I'm sure my mama bear instincts would be geared up too. :-(

Elle said...

He's so sweet. Just enjoy that new little boy. There's nothing like a baby.

stickymama said...

You are so right about us gals needing to "figure it out" for ourselves, but Moms help a lot. During one really bad relationship, my mom gave me a book called Maybe He's Just a Jerk. Enough said.